Monday, December 24, 2012

Christmas Spider

Here is a song about santa claus really being a spider in a mansuit.  Merry christmas.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Christmas Postings

Here's the 'single' from my 5th Christmas album.  If you would like a copy of this compilation, send me your physical address and I will send one your way in lieu of no Christmas gift. 

Monday, November 19, 2012

Everyone is going to think

That I am soo cool when they watch this one.  The writing-recording :: editing ratio of this song is embarrassingly low.  Maybe like 45 minutes :: 1:15 hours.  It's good that I got such an important thing done today.
The guitar is in some kind of open tuning.  Probably DAF#(?) DAD.  Dafdad?  I think it'd in Dafdad.  does anybody play in dafgad?  Is that a popular one?  It will be now, if it's not.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Tis Christmas Recording Season

1.  I ushered a bunch of songs into existence today, but I don't think I"ll post m(any?) of them here.  Except for this one, which is relatively benign.  Weird to sing about umbrellas after such a pretty day.

2.  Tis Christmas Recording Season.  This will be my fifth (5th) Christmas album, which is a great excuse to retrospectify my catalog & avoid subjecting your ears to harrowingly-thrown-together last-minute songs.  Since it will be a Holiday Sampler, I'll be trying my hand at sampling.  If anyone wants to join in on the Holiday Fun, you sure can.  I can't guarantee that it will be fun.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Storm's a-comin'

And rather than use my finite electricity time for good, like washing dishes or doing homework, I have used it for ill: recording a song with far too much mandolin.

What do you think about a 'Bum knee' app that says "storm's a-comin'" when there's a storm coming?  It wouldn't give you any other info; you'd have to research the storm yourself, like with a real bum knee.

I had another app idea, but I can't think of it now.

I meant for this song to be funnier, but I only have so much patience for writing lyrics and coming up with so many rhymes while still having it sort of make sense.  I don't know if it's even slightly witty at this point.  Shameful.

That is a picture of the moon some night when it was big-seeming.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Halloween Song

I just got internet again, so here is my third annual halloween song.  I apologize for the awful picture of a centipede (I think), but it's the most halloweenish picture I have.  I should have taken pictures of the octopus I saw recently.

My zombie girl, my crimson queen, be still my heart this halloween
You're holy roman you're byzantine; you're torn apart this halloween.

How are you so toothsome, when you're so very gruesome, I wish I knew some
Things like Whether you would greet me, or whether you'd just eat me, or how much to be on my guard

You will appear, In darkest dreams, you will-o-[the]-wisp, this halloween
I was satisfied, but you intervened, be still my heart this halloween.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

German hand cat

My euphonium kind of works again.  To celebrate, here's "I want to hold your hand" in German and some pictures of Mira.  And there's a squirrel laying down in the middle somewhere.  I challenge you to find it.  I don't know how to pronounce German words.  

Thursday, August 23, 2012

The Fly

Here's a feel-good poem by Blake set to music. I made ample use of effects.

The Fly
Little Fly
Thy summers play,
My thoughtless hand
has brush'd away.

Am not I
A fly like thee?
Or art not thou
A man like me?

For I dance
And drink & sing;
Till some blind hand
Shall brush my wing.

If thought is life
And strength & breath;
And the want
Of thought is death;

Then am I
A happy fly,
If I live,
Or if I die.

Sunday, August 19, 2012


I was thinking about mining today.  I used to be quite interested in finding neat rocks.  I remember smashing certain rocks with a sledgehammer to harvest the sweet, sweet garnets inside.  Then covetously storing said garnets in a secret box.  I often want to ask people what they would be doing at this point in the summer at age 8-10.  For me, it's smashing rocks to harvest garnets.

I went to the mountain to try and mine gold
But lost my pickaxe on the way
And do you know how much pickaxes cost?
I don't, but I've nothing to pay
So I took a deep breath and I entered the mine,
Hoping to find me a jewel,
But busted up roots were all I could find,
I foolishly felt like a fool
Since things were all wrong,
I hummed by best song,
There's a silver lining
To all this ma-lining
I felt something crawling its way up my arm
A beautiful beetle vermillion
I dropped him off lightly, and picked up a stone
Older than me by the billions
Twas then that I realized the sum of my parts
And this is the point of my story
Down in the depths of a dusty old mine
I silently struck a satori.
And I left without gold and I left without jewels
My mining sack sad and berefted
But on my way home I found my pickaxe
Right in the spot I had left it. 

Thursday, August 16, 2012


They're a kind of bird, I think.  I don't know if black spotted ones are real.  I guess probably not.  Or maybe there's One.

My voice is so high and untuneful in this.  Here's lyrics so it's perhaps not so cringeworthy.

Don't say nothing, Francis,
Don't you even breathe,
Cause the last Black spotted plover
Is perched among the reeds
The rarest thing you'll ever see
Is right before our eyes
And it'll fly away
It'll fly away
It'll fly away
In time
Don't say nothing, Francis
Ain't this moment grand
The last Black spotted plover
roosting in the sand
The only one we'll ever see
In our entire lives
And it'll fly away
It'll fly away
It'll fly away
In time
Oh darling
Why do you feel bad
Oh darling
How are you so sad
Oh darling
Why can't you just see
 The last black spotted plover
With me

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

I know about Pathfinder

I just think this one is way cooler, and way worthier of a song.

I remember when Pathfinder went to Mars; I was beyond psyched.  This is much, much more neat.  I also saw a really neat bug yesterday(?); perhaps it will be the image for my next song (about cool bugs???).

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Where are you supposed to look

When recording a video song?  I think I tried all the places.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Motorcycle gangs are still around

This is the best song about motorcycles since Daniel Johnston

Here's the lyrics to sing along.  And the chords to play along.  Oh, and try to ignore that one string that sounds like it's out of tune.  It's not.  And also my singing being out of tune.  That's not out of tune either.

It kind of feels like a bad cross between I Can See for Miles and Susan on the West Coast Waiting
Chorus C g7 C; C F G7; C g7 C; F G7 C (or something like that)

Verse  F d7 G am7 d7; F d7 G Bbdim7 g7

Motorcycle gangFollow me down the highwayMotorcycle gangWhere are you going today?
I predict you're going to the mallSpencer's giftsGetting some risqué merch to embarrassYour brother's kids.
After that you'll regroup with a songMellifluousI'm sure it's nice, but why bike when you could justCharter a bus
Motorcycle gangWhere every guy has an old ladyMotorcycle gangExcept when you're at a truck stop
Motorcycle gangI only know what I'm told I'm not judgingMotorcycle gangI wonder how many have guns
I predict that one out of threeAre packin heatAnd maybe one out of five have knife bootsOn their feet
Maybe they are heading to a concertJudas priestOr maybe to the local musicalI bet it's grease
But motorcycle girlI know we have nothing in commonYou'll bike around the worldSo I know it could never work out
Motorcycle girlYour tattoos are siouxsie sue worthyIf I had tattoosThey'd be guides for emergency surgeries
Motorcycle gangWhen you rev is it communicationDo you speak in revs?Cause I think that would be real cool.
Motorcycle gangDo you pick up the ladies by revving?Motorcycle gangAre you trying to pick up me?
If so,  I'm flattered,I'd ride in your side carWhat do you think,Can you drink in a side car?Probably not,But if so I'm your guy,Just don't go over twentyCause I don't want to die.

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Payday Loans

In response to that guy who commented on the last song. My next song will be called "kettleholes and drumlins" but that's all I know about it so far.  Maybe it will be all about things having to do with glaciers.  "kettleholes and drumlins" sounds like it'd be pretty percussive.  Maybe it will be a drums-only song.  Drums and cat meows.  And a whole lot of reverb.  Now that I check, that payday loan comment disappeared.  That makes this make less sense.  I guess it's still mildly relevant in a general sort of way.

Friday, July 6, 2012


Here's another thirty-minute song.  I'm all about writing songs in thirty minutes these days.  Any song that takes longer, it seems, is too personal to eject into the cybersphere's abyss.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Song for the Cat

Here's a 30-minute-old song--straight from the cat muse.

Chords are : C G#9 F Bb9// C C7 F F7 C Bb9 C// C C9 G#9 Bb9// etc.

Here's the lyrics so you can sing along!

Won't you please stop licking me my dear

I'll pet you when you ask for it,
And sometimes when you don't
I'll wake you when you're sleeping
And I'm feeling quite alone

I'll envy you in sunshine
And I'll pity you in rain
I'll undermine your dignity
With stupid kitty games

But though you are most interesting
When you are most weird
Won't you please stop licking me my dear

And I'm grateful for affections
Just not in liberal doses
And your parasites are not so bad
Cause I don't mind hypnosis
Your ridiculousness is most sublime
When you act ferocious
But won't you please stop licking me
It really is the grossest
Oh won't you please top licking me my dear

Though I like passing time with you
It really is the nicest
You delegate of delicate
ambassadors of Isis

But though you are most interesting
When you are most weird
Won't you please stop licking me my dear

Monday, May 28, 2012

Air Conditioner Song

The long weekend provided me with time to try to write and record a song.  I'm not entirely satisfied with the result.  I'm still afraid to play brass in this new apartment, so this is just guitars, melodica, and slide whistle.  Mira really hates the melodica.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

February update

I took the day off of school today, and one of the things I did was finally record this song: